It’s been a fantastic year for cycling in general. We have seen all 3 Grand tours won by British riders and a summer that’s actually felt like summer making for some great riding weather . We have had some good turn outs on a Saturday morning at new HQ, especially the backbone of the club, the group 2 and 3 specialists!
We are lucky enough to have caught up with everyone’s favorite Sailor and shouting enthusiast, it’s Mr Robin Bryant of HMS Duringthewar.
Robin – how has the season gone for you?
ATTENTION. GET IN TWO’S. IN TWO’S NOW.
Sorry Robin, I’m a little confused, is this an Ark reference? Were you there?
IN TWO’S, IN TWO’S THROUGH THE TOWN CENTRE PLEASE.
Oh ok – that’s great Robin … but how has your season been?
IT’S BEEN GREAT – BARCELONA, PALMA, ROME AND ATHENS ALL REAL HIGHLIGHTS FOR ME.
Oh wow, that sounds fantastic it’s a shame you hadn’t mentioned anything on social media. You’ve done a few TT’s this year – how have they gone?
WELL, I’M MORE OF A CAFÉ CRUISER MYSELF BUT I HAVE DONE THE ODD TT HERE AND THERE. PERSONALLY, I THINK TT’S ARE ALL ABOUT THE PREPARATION BOTH MENTALLY AND PHYSICALLY. BEFORE EVERY TT I’VE COMPETED THIS SEASON, I’VE ALWAYS CHECKED THAT EVERYTHING IS SHIPSHAPE AND THAT REALLY AIDS ME. OBVIOUSLY I’M MOST AT HOME RIDING IN THE WET, CHOPPY ROADS AND MAINTAINING A LOOK OUT FOR U-BOATS IS WHAT MAKES ME TICK!
What’s your favorite recovery food after a long bike ride?
WELL OBVIOUSLY FISH FINGERS, I ONLY EAT THE BEST AT THE CAPTAINS TABLE!
Have you enjoyed riding your fantastic new bike?
I DON’T OWN A NEW BIKE, IVE NEVER OWNED A NEW BIKE, OR ANYTHING NEW AT ALL, ITS JUST A DEMO, AND IF YOU SAY OTHERWISE YOU’RE GOING OVERBOARD.
Robin, we know you are a very busy man and you probably have new sea’s to sail so we won’t keep you for much longer, but one final question … how do you and Henman consistently wear the same clothing every week?
I THINK THE CAMERA IN HIS BEDROOM PLAYS A PART IN THAT.
Thanks Robin – as insightful as ever. (You all read that in Robin’s voice didn’t you!)
Congratulations Adrian on retaining his place as the second fastest Woodfield, second of course to his wife. Not to be outdone by Komfield Junior on Stava, the number of KOM’s secured by Komfield senior hasn’t gone unnoticed. Some may question the legitimacy of 10meter KOMs on housing estate back alleys, or trails that haven’t been ridden since the 60’s but not us #KingKom
Adrian was heard to say:I dropped James as a child, he seems to of turned out ok? if you say so Adrian.
Damien O’Rouke, apparently one of Corby’s finest, which we have been reliably informed is somewhere in Scotland. Another great character and there’s plenty a story to tell about Damien. Damien is also friends with Danny Metherill … So well done Damien, a great season and I’m sure you’ll only get stronger and stronger.
Quote of the year from Damien “I ride with one bottle of iron bru and one of special bru, it’s the Corby way!”
Professional Strava kudos manager, Hitesh Mehta is reported to of been suffering from a malfunction. In some sort of weird quantum loop, he is stuck in January on Welly shop ride 4, he is literally unable to get out of Wellingborough. If anyone see’s him out on his bike, please try and get along side and nudge him back on course towards Ringstead, there is a group 4 ride waiting for its leader!
Cunning plan of the year goes to Tim Neal – or Bermuda Tim as he’s now known since he’s managed to disappear and double puncture mid ride that many times this year it’s becoming a habit. Rumour has it that Tim’s wife Debbie complained about the amount of time Tim spent cycling but rather than cut down, Tim actually brought Debbie two bikes and has increased his annual mileage as he has yet another ride partner – great job Tim. #cunning
Steve Marston – Bit of an enigma in that Steve definitely turns up for rides, takes part in rides but nothing can be seen on Strava, therefore the rides couldn’t have happened. The traditional annual pull out of the Silverstone pits during the 9upTT was that strong that it caused a vacuum and almost caused Damien to fall off during the push off #truestory .
Little known fact about Steve: he owns 1 bike for every year he’s been alive, the collection is currently at 67.
Graham Reed- Made some great progress during the year but getting tempted into the dark art of time trialing. Unfortunately, Graham usually goes on a winter break and we probably won’t see him again until March. #nowetgear
When not on holiday with his parents in the Pyrenees or Alps, Junior ‘Jack Gibbs’ is a regular in G2 / G3 and can often be seen going great, or going rubbish, there’s no in-between. Jack grabbed 5th place at an NCRA at Old which is even more remarkable since he was studying for his GCSE’s at the time. #savingpocketmoneyforahelium
The G3 ‘always look on the bright side of life’ award goes to Les Pratt who recently named his ride ‘ Cold, wet, windy and a puncture group 3 ride and got dropped on every hill’. That’s the spirit Les and remember, Its only October and we’ve got 6 more months of these fun filled winter rides. #fun
VeloElites very own computer game cover model, Russ Batchelor, secured a fantastic achievement this year by becoming the first person in club history to have been dropped three times on one ride. Dropped from G1, dropped from G2 who took a wrong turn and bumped into Russ again, only to get dropped again – well done Russ. #chopperdropper
Phil Lancaster started a new job and part of his contract states he wasn’t allowed to cycle race this year, which is a shame, but his energy has been spent carrying G2 for large periods of their rides. Phil’s biggest disappointment was turning up for a ride with a broken gear cable. This promptly turned into his biggest achievement when he decided to ride the route anyway and dropped four riders whilst trying to catch the group in front. #beast
Phil said: “With no Tom, G1 has become too easy, so I have been coming up with new ways to make it a challenge!”
Captain Adrian’ Twelvetree was reported to have been looking forward to the new routes since the landscape is a lot flatter over this side of the county. Ade has been less impressed with the invasion of ‘choppers’ into the group, trying to take over and has often been heard shouting “its my group and you’ll stick to the speed …Robin”. #CaptainAde
Misfit Jason ‘2nd wheel’ McClean has stooped to new club lows this year. If it wasn’t bad enough talking about Mountain Bikes’ posting ‘Mountain Bike’ rides on Strava, and trying to encourage other group members to ride Mountain Bikes ’ at Cannock Chase, Jason has been spotted during many summer rides sporting disc brakes on a race bike! #reprimanded #blamebrexit
The ‘most original chop award’ & the ‘what a maneuver’ awards both go to Alex Pharaoh. The most original chop was awarded to Alex for managing to get his feet caught in his own mudguards and falling over like Del Boy leaning on a bar. What was even more impressive was that we hadn’t even left the car park. The ‘what a maneuver’ award is awarded after he managed to stay on his bike after being chopped by Robin #soz on a fast bend by mounting a grass verge and staying upright #lifegoals
There will be some riders that haven’t had a mention in our round up, perhaps they are the lucky ones? This is for several reasons, mostly the authors were drunk whilst writing, secondly because there are some among you that are whiter than white, we can’t find any dirt, no silly antics, no falling off, no known weird obsessions or acts of deviance at all. One such a man is Rob Heath, sure he rides a mountain bike a fair bit and did something called “Hamsterley Beast”, but other than a clear mtb and hamster fetish, we struggled to find anyone who had a bad word to say about him, although some might argue off roading and rodents are enough.
A few riders went for a day out in the Peaks back in May and this is the type of event we should organise more of next year. A few notable achievements
Mark Ainge who managed to snap two chains on two of the top 100 climbs.
Andy Mackay for turning up on a Pinarello with a Standard Groupset. In sad news Andy hasn’t been seen since either in person or on Strava, although rumour has it, he is now in a long term relationship with a new van, facebook lists it as “complicated”.
Glyn Poole for turning up with a rucksack and picnic including cheese & chutney sandwiches and allegedly, a picnic blanket and bottle of port.
Gary Hewitt – for making Glynn carry his stuff in his rucksack – #Biatch
Tim Neal and Graham Reed for getting around, pretty sure they weren’t expecting the climbs to be quite so brutal.
Paul Southern for failing again to make it to yet another Peaks ride, despite really wanting to go.